fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
She's the barista slut.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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