he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
