I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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