Just fell off a train. Bad.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize