Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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