he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
