you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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