You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
