It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
