Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
