Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
