her facebook's as public as her vagina
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
