So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
