I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I deserve this hangover.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
