What did we do last night that was yellow?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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