Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
