Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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