The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
