He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
