i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Randomize
