Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Randomize
