For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
