no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
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