plz talk dirty to me
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize