If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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