you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
