We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You can't just leave with hair like that
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Enjoy the penises
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
