I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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