he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
