We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
