do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize