So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just googled if crying burns calories
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
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