Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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