she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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