ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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