Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
