I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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