hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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