Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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