Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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