First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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