Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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