i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
