He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
