we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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