And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
