I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
