yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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