That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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