She's JV to your varsity
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
