All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
