hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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