I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize
